Man, I see in Custard Club the strongest and smartest folk who've ever whisked. I see all this potential........because I'm pretty optimistic and I know you can make this no problem! (I really hope the six people who get my constant Fight Club references enjoy these intros as much as I do.)

The first rule of Custard Club is you do not talk about Custard Club....but the second, third, and fourth are:

  • GET IT seriously. Making a custard is a bit involved and if you have everything near you, life will be way less complicated. Before you start, Get a big bowl. Put ice in it. Get another bowl and put it in the ice bowl. Like it's taking a little icy bath. Awww. Cute.
  • ALSO....Get a fine mesh strainer and put it over the empty bowl. This will catch any mistakes that may happen when you introduce the eggs into the hot cream. It'll also catch any vanilla bean shrapnel we might not want in our smooth and creamy ice cream. (It's also a FANTASTIC mask in an impromptu kitchen fencing match. Tested and approved.) 
  • A WHISK and A LADLE....will also be used. You should probably grab a SPATULA for good measure. You know what? Grab two! Let's get real Food Network with it, shall we?

    As always you can do the custard the day before but make sure you do it at least 6 hours before it goes into the machine. 
  1. Have a dairy party. Throw in the cream and the milk in the pot. Oh hey! Throw in the sugar(or syrup) and get that baby dancing. And by dancing I mean hot but not boiling. This step is the "Get The Creamy Nice And Steamy" step that we've all come to know and love.
  2. Ladle some of the party into your bowl of eggs, the whole time whisking and wiggling. Soon to be followed by jiggling, but let's think about that in 2 days when your pants are tighter. C'mon man. We don't work out to not eat. I work out because I want to eat more. Priorities.
  3. Toss those warmed up eggies back into the party pot and whisk that group together. It should thicken up in a few minutes, but you'll know for sure when you can dip a wooden spoon into the custard and draw a line that stays in it. Now just pour it through the strainer to filter out those "unwanted guests". Let the custard cool completely before covering its surface with a piece of plastic wrap and popping it in the fridge. Let chill for at least 6 hours.